Just shoot me.

“Killing a sandwich only makes it tastier.”

Your mom.

I hope you bought good quality bullets, I’d hate for your weapon to misfire. I’m looking forward to not having to go to work tomorrow.

Kill me now and you’ll never learn how to get deez…

(Gets killed anyways)

Killer: “dEeZ nUtS HaR hAr”

I Sergey we Kurt Cobain the ceiling

Alright, this better blow my mind.

discombobulate

“I just want you to understand… These edibles ain’t shit.”

They hesitated, so there’s a chance.

I’d ask to have a conversation since I’m dead anyway - what do they have to lose? May as well go out amused.

Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice

I don’t want to be a vegetable

I have information that will lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton.

“Heh, you made one mistake… Your safety’s on.”

Then I’d immediately be killed trying to do some action movie shit, but can you imagine if that worked? That would be sick

lower gun and shoots you in the back

You forgot to turn off the safety