Pennies*
I hate being on ladders, I’ll stay down here with the penises.
Hello.
You can hang on to the penis of someone who’s climbing.
You can also buy an auto-jacker and go hands free.
Does the auto-jacker go on the penis or the ladder? Honestly sounds like it could work for either one.
Don’t let them upsell you on an auto jacker, the manual ones work just fine.
I love living in the future
Even if I have a Jacob’s ladder?
Thanks for assuming it’s a handful
Level up, try using your mouth instead
I know it’s shitposting, but even if we accept the idea that God would be interested by what you do with your own body when you’re alone, isn’t the whole point of the Bible that you don’t have to climb to go to heaven, but accept God’s grace?
I.don’t understand evangelicalism.
Some would even argue that the point isn’t to accept god’s grace but to be a good neighbor and take care of your fellow man.
Some would even argue that the point isn’t to accept god’s grace but to be a good neighbor and take care of your fellow man.
Hetero women, bisexuals and gay guys might just… Stop at that level and stay for a bit.
I’m going to keep climbing until the ladder turns into titties.
So stop at every rung to jerk off. I’m not in a hurry.
No… I like touching myself way too much
You will never touch your penis with your hands full of heaven ladder
Bold of you to assume I want to go to heaven with all of those “good Christians”
I would consider that an eternal punishment
That sounds like my version of hell.
What if I make a penis ladder? Buncha dudes with raging hard boners standing on each other’s shoulders. Two towers of this, with the tips touching.
What songs lyrics are these fire verses???
Bloodhail by Have A Nice Life?
“Faces sweaty, arms and legs, what a glorious set of stairs we make” 😉
This is gonna drive me insane wondering what tune you sung those words to in your head. 😬
If the boners are consistently rigid enough, you might be able to space them out a little to allow for a wider climbing stance, considering the tip-to-tip pressure would be unlikely to generate much added support for your bodyweight.
Hopefully it doesn’t take more than four hours to ascend.
I mean, wouldn’t you have fairly strong grip strength with a lot of “practice?”
I guess someone with that condition could climb the ladder in a hurricane.
Hey who said I had to have my hands full of my own penis? I don’t need to touch it to masturbate, and I’ve touched plenty of other guy’s penises. Is my “ladder to heaven” just going to be made out of every guy I slept with? Seems a bit sexist.
Plot twist. The ladder is made of penises.
Oooohhhh, I get it now, it’s because you can’t climb a normal leader with a raging boner, or at least it’s unsafe since you break every step as you drag along.
But as others have pointed out, a leader made of dicks doesn’t have that problem since they snap back into place.
God must be a great engineer.