• Allero@lemmy.today
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    2 months ago

    I don’t like being associated with feminism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both women and men suffer, and the blame is often shifted on men as “carriers of patriarchy”. Besides, it is originally about women fighting for their rights, not men, and at any point in time women can note that it’s for the women and about women, effectively shaking off the very men who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

    We can do better by building a wider antisexist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Women face sexism. Men face sexism. Some of it stems from patriarchy, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of feminism, not under the banner of masculism, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats men and women as equals.

    • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      No true Scotsman, amirite?

      Antisexism would be great. I’m not sure that it won’t easily be coopted by toxic feminist or incels. But I’d join

      • Allero@lemmy.today
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        2 months ago

        It kinda exists, but I feel it is drowned in the era of outrage-based media.

        And yes, it is often appropriated by various actors, even though the premise couldn’t be clearer.

    • LanguageIsCool@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      I don’t like being associated with anti-racism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both black and white people suffer, and the blame is often shifted on white people as “carriers of systemic racism”. Besides, it is originally about black people fighting for their rights, not white people, and at any point in time black people can note that it’s for and about black people, effectively shaking off the very white people who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

      We can do better by building a wider anti-racist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Black people face racism. White people face racism. Some of it stems from systemic racism, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of pro-black, not under the banner of pro-white, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats #AllLives as equals.

      This is how these posts come across to me.

      There’s a power imbalance. Feminism is about bringing women up and redistributing the power.

      Men should be able to talk about their issues. And I feel like they usually are. It’s not a problem.

      It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women. Or when it’s done without awareness of the history of the power imbalance.

      A lot of it isn’t to be taken personally and if it is, I think that says something about you. When I hear blame and anger towards privileged groups that I’m a part of, even if I suffer too, my gut reaction is never “but…” I understand that it’s a reaction to the power, the history, and the general picture.

      • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.works
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        2 months ago

        It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women.

        You’re talking about feminism in a thread started about men’s mental health.

        Dearest Kettle,

        I write to you on this auspicious occasion to bring into your awareness a matter which has consumed my attention as of late. It seems you bear a certain patina of the very darkest of colors, one might even go so far as to call you “black.”

        Eternally yours,

        Pot

        • Allero@lemmy.today
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          2 months ago

          I support feminist ideas, but don’t find them fitting to look at mens’ problems.

          You randomly slap misogynist labels left and right because you got so rigid you cannot even start to comprehend any view more nuanced than “feminism will save us all!”

          Nothing wrong with feminism when it comes to women and their issues, by the way.

        • dermanus@lemmy.ca
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          2 months ago

          I too think in absolutes. Either you’re a Christian or a devil worshipper.

          Either you’re with us, or you’re with the terrorists.

          Wow, life got much easier when I eliminated nuance.

      • Allero@lemmy.today
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        2 months ago

        The problem is in your first remake of the quote.

        I don’t like being associated with anti-racism…

        I support antisexism. You just equated feminism and antisexism, and the latter is a bigger category than the former.

        Nothing wrong with feminism as a fight for women’s rights, but looking at mens’ problems through the prism of feminism is the same as looking at racism against whites through the prism of BLM, or apples through bananas. That’s simply the wrong tool.

        There is feminism - about women. There is masculism (which is currently heavily discredited by patriarchal shitheads, but originally comes from the same place of equality as feminism) - about men. There are also nonbinaries fighting for their place in the world. And there is antisexism combining them all.