• surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    That’s why I’m a feminist. They understand everyone suffers under the patriarchy. Especially men who are forbidden to show emotion.

    • tias@discuss.tchncs.de
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      2 months ago

      Under some older meaning of feminist sure. But 90% of the people who claim to be feminist these days think of it solely as giving women more privilege, and any discussion of men’s issues is considered anti-feminist. Whatever meaning of equality that there used to be is all but lost.

      • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Did you know that 74% of statistics are made up on the spot?

        How many feminist podcasts do you consume, and when did you notice the change?

        • tias@discuss.tchncs.de
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          2 months ago

          I’m not talking about feminists who actually know their stuff (such as most - but not all - who make podcasts on the subject). Those are niche subcultures. I’m talking about the self-proclaimed feminists on social media like TikTok, Instagram, or the comment sections on Reddit and Facebook. The people that the general public comes in contact with and who shape the meaning of our language. Your attempt at gatekeeping kind of underscores my point.

          But yes you’re right that when I said 90% I didn’t base it on some scientific survey. It’s the general sense that I get on the internet and read what’s on my feed.

        • Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de
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          2 months ago

          That comment was already made and most symbols mean multiple things. A German user and a Japanese user will have very different interpretations of a swastika. Whose Interpretation is correct, is depending on the situation. If you think the swastika on the tourist map in Japan stands for Nazism, you are wrong. If you think the swastika on a wall in Germany stands for good fortune, you are most probably wrong.

          • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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            2 months ago

            He’s a German and literally calling the vast majority of feminists sexists, dip shit.

            Also, we know “he” is “you” and you’re too lazy to make your alts on different instances, which makes it easy to notice when you forget to swap your sockpuppets.

            Kindly follow your leader, thanks.

            • Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de
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              2 months ago

              Lol, I am not. And a lot of people who call themselves feminists are sexist. If you disagree with that, please name 1 thing that the general feminist movement is tackling in support of men. And the current patriarchy is harmful for men too. So there are things to tackle.

              A German is not forced to use a symbol in an international setting in the same way, they might use it in the local setting.

              Please don’t use insults.

              • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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                2 months ago

                Oh, you’re just independently using a specious argument to randomly claim modern Japanese people using a swastika is the same thing as the existence of historical examples and conflating it with this situation, while defending all his incorrect points.

                An argument that, just by accident, ignores all the relevant context of his complaints.

                Also, sure, here you go, the parts where feminism believes in gender equality:

                https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminism

                It’s the whole fucking thing, incel.

                • Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de
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                  2 months ago

                  Yes we talk about symbols, Germans, especially AFD (they are Nazis) and different interpretations of these symbols, I think of that argument. I don’t know how you are thinking but usually things mentioned in a conversation inspire me.

                  Ah yes. The best you can do is a vague motion.

                  Let’s talk about the women’s issues that I can name on the top of my head that the feminist movement tries to tackle (and I obviously support):

                  • wage gap
                  • not being taken seriously by e.g. doctors
                  • me too
                  • domestic violence
                  • the whole double standard of how emotions get framed, women’s emotions get framed as childish and overreactive.
                  • creating awareness for the mental workload of planing an household which often women have to handle.
                  • abortion rights
    • Allero@lemmy.today
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      2 months ago

      I don’t like being associated with feminism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both women and men suffer, and the blame is often shifted on men as “carriers of patriarchy”. Besides, it is originally about women fighting for their rights, not men, and at any point in time women can note that it’s for the women and about women, effectively shaking off the very men who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

      We can do better by building a wider antisexist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Women face sexism. Men face sexism. Some of it stems from patriarchy, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of feminism, not under the banner of masculism, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats men and women as equals.

      • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        No true Scotsman, amirite?

        Antisexism would be great. I’m not sure that it won’t easily be coopted by toxic feminist or incels. But I’d join

        • Allero@lemmy.today
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          2 months ago

          It kinda exists, but I feel it is drowned in the era of outrage-based media.

          And yes, it is often appropriated by various actors, even though the premise couldn’t be clearer.

      • LanguageIsCool@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        I don’t like being associated with anti-racism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both black and white people suffer, and the blame is often shifted on white people as “carriers of systemic racism”. Besides, it is originally about black people fighting for their rights, not white people, and at any point in time black people can note that it’s for and about black people, effectively shaking off the very white people who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

        We can do better by building a wider anti-racist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Black people face racism. White people face racism. Some of it stems from systemic racism, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of pro-black, not under the banner of pro-white, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats #AllLives as equals.

        This is how these posts come across to me.

        There’s a power imbalance. Feminism is about bringing women up and redistributing the power.

        Men should be able to talk about their issues. And I feel like they usually are. It’s not a problem.

        It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women. Or when it’s done without awareness of the history of the power imbalance.

        A lot of it isn’t to be taken personally and if it is, I think that says something about you. When I hear blame and anger towards privileged groups that I’m a part of, even if I suffer too, my gut reaction is never “but…” I understand that it’s a reaction to the power, the history, and the general picture.

          • dermanus@lemmy.ca
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            2 months ago

            I too think in absolutes. Either you’re a Christian or a devil worshipper.

            Either you’re with us, or you’re with the terrorists.

            Wow, life got much easier when I eliminated nuance.

          • Allero@lemmy.today
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            2 months ago

            I support feminist ideas, but don’t find them fitting to look at mens’ problems.

            You randomly slap misogynist labels left and right because you got so rigid you cannot even start to comprehend any view more nuanced than “feminism will save us all!”

            Nothing wrong with feminism when it comes to women and their issues, by the way.

        • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.works
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          2 months ago

          It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women.

          You’re talking about feminism in a thread started about men’s mental health.

          Dearest Kettle,

          I write to you on this auspicious occasion to bring into your awareness a matter which has consumed my attention as of late. It seems you bear a certain patina of the very darkest of colors, one might even go so far as to call you “black.”

          Eternally yours,

          Pot

        • Allero@lemmy.today
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          2 months ago

          The problem is in your first remake of the quote.

          I don’t like being associated with anti-racism…

          I support antisexism. You just equated feminism and antisexism, and the latter is a bigger category than the former.

          Nothing wrong with feminism as a fight for women’s rights, but looking at mens’ problems through the prism of feminism is the same as looking at racism against whites through the prism of BLM, or apples through bananas. That’s simply the wrong tool.

          There is feminism - about women. There is masculism (which is currently heavily discredited by patriarchal shitheads, but originally comes from the same place of equality as feminism) - about men. There are also nonbinaries fighting for their place in the world. And there is antisexism combining them all.

    • drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      I’ve very rarely see that from feminist circles. And even then it feels like we can only have the emotions they want us to have and not the ones we do have.

      • dermanus@lemmy.ca
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        2 months ago

        I’ve had the same experience. Or if you do hear about it, it’s reluctant and only in relation to how it affects women.

        I’m fine with women having their own advocacy group, I don’t think they’re equipped to take on men too.

        • drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          And whenever there is a push for a male advocacy group it gets labeled as some incel shit. Which attracts alt right types and suddenly it’s yet another pro republican group.

          Men can’t have advocacy groups.

        • ZeroOne@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          Buddy they oppose & damage & hijack men’s issues (E.g: Conscription & False allegations)

      • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        What emotions do you have that you think you can’t?

        You’re allowed to have anger. But if you’re like many, you conflate the anger feeling with the shouting/punching/violent actions. Toxic actions are bad, but the feelings are valid and ok. Need to find a proper way to express those emotions.